Are You Rogue Enough?

Where can you find a partially nude ukulele player from South Africa? Why at the Rogue festival of course.

The Rogue is by far one of the coolest things to roll through this town and this year was no exception. In all I caught 6 1/2 shows, if you count the guys dancing behind the counter of Tower Dogs. Which you should.

Speaking of, Tower Dogs are delicious.

It's hard to pick a favorite with each show being so different but it's hard to go wrong with Songs 4 Pints and their Irish antics. With a show revolving around singing in exchange for pints of Guinness things quickly dissolved from a formal concert into the giggly singing of pub songs with new friends.

There is a Disco Fever street gang wandering around the tower district in shiny gold shirts and massive sideburns.

The aforementioned Ukulele player had a banjolele. AND a resonator ukulele. Needless to say the venue manager was not happy with all the drool on the floor where I was sitting.

Since I've shaved my head I've become increasingly appreciative of the giant propane powered heat stands that the Rogue set up in its out door venues.

The Rogue Festival is said to be the biggest fringe festival west of the Mississippi, organizers decided against calling it the "Fresno Fringe" because "rogue" just feels so much cooler to say.

Go ahead. Say it.

Rogue.

It makes you want to wear a bandanna.


EDIT:: Don't forget to keep voting! http://worldtravelerinternship.com/member/andrew-hoover/

Encore!!!

So I have a little time and a little prepaid internet left so we are going to take a quick journey through whatever happens to pop into my head before my time runs out.

Nobody has been able to accurately recreate a good hotdog, no matter how "American" the stand claims to be.

Weirdest thing I've seen in a second story window: Bulldozer

I got to play on stage at the world renowned Bennet's Jazz Club as a guest artist for the Melbourne International Jazz Festival.

You will never see cops in a group of less than 5 on the streets of Melbourne

The best way to learn a public transportation system is to get hopelessly lost on one

At any given time, New Zealand Pop culture is 8 to 10 years behind ours. Australia sits at about 5

They decided to build their mall around an old shot making factory, with-out tearing it down, so you walk out of Diesel or FCUK or Donut King and smack into the brick wall of a 5 story metalurgy factory just kind of hanging out in the middle of everything.

Some guy in a suit thought I was his son and followed me for 4 blocks before he realized his mistake.

Today I saw an Aboriginal man who had dyed his sideburns (massive sideburns) silver, the hair immediately around his ears pinkish purple and the hair around his bald spot bleach-blonde. The rest of his hair was black.

Combination shops are a big deal here, for instance Haircuts and Pet Grooming, or Pizza and Kebabs.

Sure, why not?

All over town there are tiny tile mosaic space invaders (from the game) about 20 ft up and just chillin' on the wall. I've counted almost 30, each one by itself.

Almost every single bar or restaurant in this town serves pizza for really cheap, and it makes me happy.

There is a donut shop that sells Cactus Cooler. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, there is no explaining the awesomeness it entails.

The Boat That Rocked, Rocks

Australians are very punny

They have a very weird version of football here, I understand it less then Cricket.

In the middle of the Museum of Melbourne, there is a forest. With snakes and fish and everything

Welp, out of time, hope you enjoyed this last minute encore

Until next time,

Cheers,
The Wayward Hoover

Kangaroos Are Dirty, also last international post.....for now

Greetings from Melbourne!! Since I left you last I have visited Flinn's Reef, Milnn Reef, Sydney, Tourqay, Geelong, Lorne, Port Fairy, The 12 Apostles, Tommy's Lookout, Hall's Gap, Rose's Gap, the Grampians National Park, and Loch Ard Gorge. Not to mention about half of the nooks and crannies spread thickly across Melbourne city center

*Inhales*

It's been a busy to say the least.


I really have no idea where I should start and which stories are worth including so I'll just start with the diving. Hard to go wrong with a wonder of the world right?

In Cairns there are three types of buildings; empty ones, restaurants and dive shops.

My kind of town.

After repacking my stuff in the dark into a bag for home and a bag for travel, a van stole me away from my hostel and shuttled me to the docks where I was given milk and a slice of cake and told to wait while they took all of my stuff and put it in my cabin and fluffed my pillow for me

The cake was delicious.

Much to my delight the cake was a constant fixture in life on the dive boat, our schedule started at 6 in the am and went something like this:

Dive cake dive breakfast dive cake dive cake and lunch dive cake dive dinner and cake dive dive

...cake.

It was wonderful.

For all you fish freaks out there I saw so many fish I couldn't even begin to try and list them all here......what's that?? You want me to try anyways?? Well if you insist.

I saw Anemone Fish, Maorie Wrasse*, Bumphead Parrot fish*, Parrot Fish, Butterflyfish, Butterfly Fish (there's a difference), Angel Fish, Black spotted puffer, Yellow Spotted Puffer, Orange and Black Puffer, Brown Puffer, Grey Pipefish*, Yellow Pipefish*, Lionfish, Grey Reef Shark*, White Tip Reef Shark*, Black Reef Shark*, Mako Shark*, Common Hermit Crab, Silver Fish, Common Coral Trout, Black Banded Triple Fin*, Common Reef Lobster, Red Sea Bass, Round Ray, Shovel Nose Guitar Fish, Greenback Turtle, Various Trigger Fish, Surgeon Fish, Forcep Fish, Reef Eel, Cardinal Fish, Little Blue Annoying Fish, Big Blue Annoying Fish, Spiny Sea Cucumber*, Hairy Sea Cucumber, Totally Gross Sea Cucumber, Giant Clams*, Less Than Giant Clams, Panicked New SCUBA Diver, and of course the Goofy American Fish.

* = something that was bigger and/or longer than me

That is maybe a quarter of what I saw, but it's all I can remember.

For those of you playing the home game and who are slightly less interested in the specific names of all the fish, I saw the entire cast of Finding Nemo.

Got there autographs.

Went out to lunch and pitched ideas for their next movie and how I will direct it.

(Minus Bruce)

If we weren't underwater than we were on the top deck eating cake or dancing or running face-first off the edge and falling to the water 25 feet below us.

I saw a crocodile. It was a baby, but it coulda ate my toes.

The city of Melbourne was built to order just for me, I am convinced of it. The layout was originally designed with wide streets for moving large carts of goods, which the citizens promptly ignored and created their own intricate system of alleyways and tunnels to get around the town.

This city is alive, and when you cut it bleeds adventure.

I have been here for about a week and a half and have been exploring from sunrise to sunrise and have maybe worked my way over half of this city.

Maybe.

Big Maybe.

There are two sets of doors here, the ones that are open during the day, and the ones that are open at night... With that in mind let's say I've only seen a quarter of the city.

Most stores don't have signs, the good ones are only accessible through the back of another store and the best ones are in the back, around a corner and down a flight of stairs. And you have to knock.

I pet (petted?) a Kangaroo. It was dirty.

There is a massive open air market here that sells all sorts of discount wares and fresh foods and fried foods and fried discount wares.....and a homeless man having a butterfly painted on his face.

I get on an airplane for the states tomorrow and I'm not sure how I feel about that.

The Melbourne International Jazz Festival runs from April 26th to May 2nd.

Excuse me while I wipe the drool from my face

*wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiipe*

The festival and its events however were hidden from view, to the uninitiated you would never know that jazz talent and appreciators from all over the world were converging on the city to share and experience alike the new flavors and old recipes being traded in back alleys and on performance hall stages.

Walk down any given empty alley and knock on the right door, it would be opened to reveal a packed house, stretching to point an ear towards the corner stage where the likes of Jim Black, Charlie Haden, Marc Hannaford, Katie Noonan and countless others were letting the music do the talking for them.

It was unreal. If the city bleeds adventure then it certainly Screams, swoons and cries jazz

Now there is a certain matter which is most unfortunate but we all must address together.

My trip is ending, and soon (Tomorrow Soon). However my adventures will not be ending, if I have anything to do about it. I will be rumbling around the central valley for about a month before heading off again to work as Ranger Director on Catalina island, and then after that, who knows??

I should mention that I lived in a van for a week in the Grampians National Park. Also google the 12 Apostles on the Great Ocean Road, they were awesome.

The question is, should I keep tip-tapping at my keyboard to share my experiences, accidents, ravings and discoveries? Or should I leave it as a tribute to the epic journey that these last 4 or 5 months have been?

I will definitely return to at least share some pictures that I feel represent the various highlights of the trip, as I know you are all just tripping over yourselves to see exactly what I have been rambling about.

But before that, I have one more night to try and trick this City into showing me what she's hiding, so until then

Cheers,
The Wayward Hoover

"Who wants to be run over by the Zorb?"

What a silly question. Of course I want to be run over by a Zorb. Who wouldn't?

That's right dear readers I'm back after an extended stay in a magical land where you have to pay for internet.

Places I have been since my last post for you google earth geeks: Picton, Kaikoura, Christchurch, Cass Field Station, Westport, Greymouth, Hokitiki and am currently staying in a field station in Harihari *Gasp*.

For the past week or so we've been bouncing around mountain field research stations where there is no internet *tear* and even when we're in town you have to pay for it, which I'm not going to do.

I finally went Zorbing, which was awesome. They filled it with water and its the closest thing I think I can get to riding in a washing machine.

During a free day in Christchurch me and a friend decided to take advantage of a nearby gondola and take some bikes back down it. After being reminded exactly how long it has been since I rode a bike on the first hill it was down hill the rest of the way. I should also mention the massive wind gusts that had me riding at a 45 degree angle (Karma for Wellington?). It was so windy that flies congregated on the side of our legs and bikes to get out of the wind.

I was chased through Cathedral Square by marching bagpipes, into a wall of more bagpipers(??) Apparently I wandered into some sort of Bagpiping competition while I was looking at a man in a top-hat.

The most interesting pizza I have ever eaten was on a whole wheat crust with onions, spinach leaf, fresh hen, ham and hare with mozzarela cheese and bleu cheese chunks. The sauce was plum sauce.

While we were in New Plymouth we were actually staying outside of town. The Profs dropped us off in town and gave us directions (kind of) to wander back into the holiday park (a motel/rv/campsite/whatever the heck else you want it to be). On our way back (well after sunset) it occured to us that we had no idea where we were going, so we stopped some poor random kiwi on the path to point us in the right direction. She proceeded to invite us to her house (think beach-front villa with windows for walls) offer us dinner, ice cream, introduce us to her dog and sons (interchangeable apparently) and then give us a ride home, leaving us with an invitation to wander back for another meal and to meet her daughters who were visiting from America of all places. She was nice.

There are at least 23 different ways to prepare black-eyed peas, I know because that's what I've had for dinner every night since Christchurch.

It more or less never stops raining here, the current storm has been going for almost a week.

There is a cave near Greymouth that I am going to get married in, and then go rafting through.

Bookstores here are only for the adventure spirited, sure there are the ones like Borders but most of them are pretty well hidden. My favorite so far was a store hidden in the back of an antique shop. I wandered upstairs where there was a clothing store and in the back of the store there was a little nook with a giant bookcase in it, when I got closer there was a door to another room crammed with bookshelves and a little cash register in the corner. Books three deep on the shelves it was smaller then my room at home with honestly thousands of books lying around.

When leaving Kaikoura our train was cancelled and we were left scrambling to find a bus to get to Christchurch.

I swam with dolphins. I hit one (on accident) in the face.

I found a blues bar in Christchurch called The Southern Blues Bar (kiwis aren't known for their creativity). It was pretty good and they let me go up and jam with the house band which was pretty sweet.

Everyone comments on my accent. I think they're nuts.

I saw watchmen on March 4th. With the dateline that's 2 days before you. And I was the only one in the theater.


I found a "Mexican" food place in Auckland that tasted like Thai food. I want a quesadilla more than life itself at this point.

Tomato sauce (ketchup) is still really weird here.

You know that crusty old bum/troubadour that you always see in movies? I found him. He lives at the Strawberry Tree in Kaikoura and he is hilarious. I think his name is Steve. He was playing with this band (by band I mean two guitar players, one from Brazil and the other from Czech Republic and by playing with I mean wandering between the two while they played their set.)

American pool is impossible to find here. Every table has billiards a little bigger than golf balls and side pockets with rounded rails, it's ridiculous. All I want is a free pool table with real billiards.

I watched Breakfast at Tiffany's at the Botanic Garden in Christchurch, and I watched the rain scene, while it was raining.

That's right, be jealous.


There is a man in Cathedral Square in Christchurch who looks just like Doc from Back to the Future. They call him Wizard. He has been screaming at passer-by for over ten years they say. He has a milk crate that he hides his water bottle under, no one knows why.

Ok.

This is all I can remember for now, I may or may not have knocked my head on the roof of a cave (repeatedly).

Cheers,
The Wayward Hoover

More Hokey Pokey Than You Can Shake a Stick at and Not a Maple Bar in Sight

New Zealand!!!!

Where do I even begin?! Well, the simple answer is: I don't know where to start so over the next few posts I will tell of the odyssey that was getting to this beautiful country. Also, pictures will follow shortly when things settle down and I can sit and put it all together.

It was a a beautiful (cloudy) morning (ish) when we rolled up to the buzzing (empty) Fresno International (1 flight to Mexico) Airport. A quick puddle jump up to SFO and my compatriots and I hunkered down for our 7 hour lay-over, which consisted mostly of low-speed chases up and down the moving sidewalks in the international terminal. Naturally what's the only thing to do after a 7 hour layover? Delay the flight of course!! The plane, which had been sitting there all day mind you, had been under catered somehow and everyone was boarded with the exception of the last 10 or 15 people (my row) while more food was put on the plane.

Don't worry dear readers, that is where the troubles end! I've decided to only fly international from now on. If I'm going to Phoenix, I'll fly down to Mexico City first and connect because this is the only way to fly!! There is this magical screen in the back of the seat in front of me loaded with hundreds of movies. On that note, I highly recommend "The Counterfeiters", a German language film about a massive counterfeiting operation in Nazi concentration camps during WWII... but I digress. Flying international is wonderful and I thought you should know.


On a more current note, classes have started and I have now spent almost 30 hours wandering around the Te Papa museum here in Wellington. Most of this wandering involved doing research in this library hidden in the back of the top floor, which is actually kind of cool. There are these massive frame-less glass automatic doors that only open with a card key and there are original printings of Darwin's The Origin of Species. Other than that though the classes are pretty low key (or Quay here in the NZ).

There are two other schools staying in our dormitories (called the Weir House), one from GA Tech, who are like ghosts, and one from Lewis and Clark University in Oregon. We've actually only heard rumors that the GA Tech kids are here, but I stumbled on the LC students late on the second night and glorious ukulele/guitar/melodica/harmonica jams ensued for the rest of the night. I've decided that they are awesome.


There is so much to tell and so little time (I'm borrowing laptops to piece together this post) but suffice to say that I am alive and doing my very best to get into trouble (unless my mother is reading this, in which case I am sitting in my dorm room, doing my homework with my passport chained to my leg).

More to come soon!

Till then, Cheers!!

The Wayward Hoover